” They are so perfect together!” “Look at them?”. My daughter will be happy in her home, I know that. The mother of the bride silently said”.
” I wish am like her, the single sisters murmured”.
” What could go wrong, with a beautiful smile like that, the single brothers whispered”.
So, the journey began. He was her hero, her everything and so was she. He was rich but had a big heart, the kind of heart that would never hurt her( or so she thought). Each other was all they wanted and that seemed quite enough. She is a believer and so was he is, they have faith and believe they can weather any storms of life.
” But all that was about to change”.
A year into the marriage, the love began to dwindle. The lies started to roll in. The late nights became convenient. Their relationship became like that of a parent and a child. He would get mad at the thinnest things. He stopped eating her meal, she couldn’t find the sparks she once saw in his eyes. They stopped praying together, studying the Bible? “That was like waiting for a plane to arrive at the seaport.”
They had the aim of helping each other achieve their goals, but that wasn’t happening. Everything she wished for, everything she prayed for, her perfect world seems to be crumbling before her.
” What happened Lord?””
” Where did we miss it?” She whispered” We used to be a team. We were the perfect couple. We smiled over everything.”
We love each other Lord. ” It’s just one year after our marriage and we are already living like strangers. We don’t talk anymore, we barely make love together. ” How are we supposed to have our own children? I’m not receiving my goals in marriage neither is he. He secludes me from every important decisions.
As a believer, how do I walk away from my marriage? What do I tell the people, everyone?
” I keep loosing weight, my hair keeps falling off. My heart races down to my tummy at his presence.
” He used to adore me.”
” I can’t pray and I can’t sleep.”
” Do I stay or do I walk away?
“Lord, am Knocking On Heaven’s Door, please open up!”
“How can I raise my hands, clench my fist and punch her Lord?” I didn’t mean to.” What’s happening to me? He says.
What happened to us? She longs and deserves my love but I can’t seem to offer her that.
“Did we rush in? Did we make a mistake?
We used to talk but now all we do is argue and shout. I haven’t been treating her right. I can’t seem to do right by her.
My  pride, materialism, and urge to dominate has turned me into a cold, bitter young man.
” Am loosing my wife. I need wisdom Lord, Proverbs 4:7 says ” wisdom is the principal thing….”
Am tired of sleeping with regrets. All we have now are memories and am hanging on to it.
” We are a family, I am prepared. I have anticipated it. I am doing what I never thought would be done am choosing to stay and make it work, while we KNOCK ON HEAVEN’S DOOR”.
One similarity between this marriage and many other marriage that is not so good is the fact that the relationships changed for the bad over time and we let it happen. It’s very easy to drift away in relationships and in marriages.
There are so many factors responsible for couples drifting apart and they are never far fetched. Oftentimes they get bored of one another, they start to do things separately and neglect the little things they ought to pay attention to *Spending quality time together“.
As believers, married or single, God expects us to work to redeem our love, find our way to the passion and desire we have for our spouses and diligently seek him.
“I deem it of more value to find out a truth about however light a matter than to engage in long disputes about the greatest questions without achieving any truth.- Lisa Randall
We all need to knock on heaven’s door, there’s always a solution behind the door.”

Whitney Edna Ibe is the Executive Consultant, Life & Mental Health Coach, and Writer/ Editor at Whitney Edna Ibe Consult (Blog),, The Social Talks,, and Mental Wellness Society International. She is in charge of consultations, services, and implementation.

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